Sanya Malhotra says desi ‘acts of service’ hurt women
Sanya Malhotra has spoken about breaking old patterns in her own family. She admitted she “forced” her mother to step back from the kitchen and focus on herself instead.
According to her, the habit of women expressing love through nonstop service is not healthy. In many South Asian homes, she said, women spend their days caring for others while their own goals get set aside.
She brought this up in a recent interview. Her own house followed the same pattern growing up. Women stayed in the kitchen. Men waited around for things to be handed to them. She said she didn’t fully see how much pressure her mother was under until she moved away to Mumbai.
One memory stood out for her. Her mother once cried simply because she felt too sick to cook. Sanya told her that food had nothing to do with love. She explained that cooking is just one way people show care, not the only way it can be shown.
That moment shifted things at home. Sanya started nudging her parents away from old habits. Her mother now listens when Sanya tells her to skip the kitchen for a day. She said it makes her proud watching her mother take time for herself in the mornings instead of rushing straight to chores.
Her father was not left out either. Sanya said she often pushed him to do small things, like getting his own glass of water or making a simple meal. She admitted the change has not fully stuck yet, but she keeps reminding him.
She connected all of this to her character in Mrs. In the film, she plays a newlywed whose entire identity gets swallowed by household duties. Sanya said many women tell her the story feels personal to them. That response, she said, leaves her both upset and hopeful, since even a small shift in mindset feels worth it to her.
She also called out how sacrifice tends to get romanticised, especially when it comes to mothers. Women, she said, are often expected to give up their own dreams the moment they become parents.
Talking about her mother’s past, Sanya revealed she once wanted to become a fashion designer. It took her years to understand her mother had dreams of her own beyond raising a family.
As for the criticism Mrs received, Sanya said none of it bothered her. She said she has no interest in defending her views to people who never even watched the film.
She last appeared in Netflix’s Toaster and is currently working on Bandar and Sundar Poonam.
