Marriage is a holy partnership created by God, and when it encounters difficulties, seeking His guidance is the most rewarding way to healing. While difficulties in marriage are unavoidable, healing and reconciliation are attainable through faith, understanding, and actionable steps based on God’s Word. Below is a step-by-step method for mending a damaged marriage in God’s way.
You may want to Read: How To Fix A Broken Marriage God’s Way: Rebuild Love
1. Acknowledging the Brokenness
Recognizing the fissures is the first step toward healing a marriage. It is critical to openly confess concerns such as misunderstanding, a lack of intimacy, and unresolved disputes. The Bible says in Proverbs 28:13, “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” Confronting the challenges with humility creates space for God’s grace to enter your relationship.
Steps to Take:
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Schedule uninterrupted time for a heartfelt talk with your spouse.
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Use “I” expressions to describe your sentiments without assigning blame.
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Pray together, asking God to reveal areas for improvement and provide clarity.
2. Inviting God into Your Marriage
God must stay at the heart of any marriage, particularly one under turmoil. Without Him, hatred, pride, and resentment can easily take hold. According to Matthew 19:6, “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
Practical actions:
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Commit to daily prayer as a couple, asking God to work in your relationship.
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Consider verses regarding love and forgiving, such as 1 Corinthians 13:4–7.
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Attend church services or marriage counseling sessions founded on Christian ideas.
3. Practicing Forgiveness and Letting Go of Resentment
Unforgiveness is a big impediment to a marriage’s healing process. God’s approach entails providing grace, just as He forgives us. Ephesians 4:32 says, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.”
How to Start Forgiving:
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Reflect on the pain, but choose not to dwell on it.
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Verbally express your forgiveness to your spouse, releasing any grudges.
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Journal your emotions and use prayer to let go of bitterness.
4. Strengthening Communication
Poor communication can sever even the strongest friendships. Active listening, empathy, and open discourse are all necessary for restoring communication. James 1:19 notes that “everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”
Strategies for Better Communication:
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Schedule daily “check-in” periods to share feelings and concerns.
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Active listening involves repeating your spouse’s statements to ensure comprehension.
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Avoid interrupting or responding defensively during conversations.
5. Rebuilding Trust and Intimacy
Trust is the foundation of any successful marriage. Rebuilding trust requires consistency and accountability. Physical and emotional connections are also important in reconnecting as a couple. Song of Solomon 2:16 expresses the beauty of marital intimacy: “My beloved is mine, and I am his.”
Rebuilding Trust:
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Be open about your thoughts, actions, and emotions.
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Keep pledges, no matter how minor they appear.
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Set limits to defend your marriage from external threats.
Reviving Intimacy:
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Spend meaningful time together away from distractions.
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Small gestures, such as holding hands or writing love letters, are effective ways to express affection.
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Address any emotional wounds that may prevent physical connection.
6. Seeking Wise Counsel
God brings people into our lives to impart wisdom and advice. Consulting with a competent pastor, Christian counselor, or experienced couple can provide new perspectives and biblical insights. Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors, there is safety.”
What to Do:
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Look for a Christian counselor who specializes in marriage issues.
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Join a marriage-focused small group at your church.
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Share your struggles with a spiritually mature couple you both respect.
